My weekends are shot. No one wants to hang out. What is there to do? I can’t just stay home and rot. I’m young. I have to be used before my sell by date. But nobody wants me. I cannot just sit around any longer. I can’t just wait for the few I know to be free…I have to explore. I have to be free. So I walk the streets of New York.

Sometimes when I’m out by myself, at 3 am, I just want to go away. I’ve walked so far from Manhattan that I’m not even sure where in Brooklyn I’m at anymore. When I walk, it’s usually late at night. I leave outta the blue. I just get dressed and get out without telling anyone where I’m going. One day I think I might leave and never return. That’s what I want to do. Go somewhere else and start anew.

Everything you have only extends as far as you can see. I’ve seen a lot…and I wanna see more. NYC is big, but I’ve seen the ocean. I’ve seen Europe, I’ve seen the Caribbean, and I’ve seen Africa. I can’t explain how it is to live amongst the stars in the freedom of the sea. To be the only human for hundreds of mile in any direction. To go days without seeing another man made object. To finally feel free.

What really kills me are those birds that fly in the middle of nowhere. They are at least a thousand miles from land…Living to let the winds take them to wherever it flows. They soar across the ocean to make do with instinct and well…not much more. I find peace in that.
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One day I’m gonna do it. I’m gonna grab all my cash, and take the first international flight outta here…I’ll take life from there. If you ever looked at a map, and wondered what’s beyond its boarders…well…that’s where I wanna go. I just want to disappear from the map and explore on my own…
I’ve already got my foot in the door. When I left the ship in Africa…you know how easy it would have been for me to just walk away and never return…[When I explored the city of Djibouti, I look for advantages…things and people I can use to gain anything. During my time ashore, I found someone I can trust, and a place I can rest….that’s all I needed in my life.]….But I did return to the ship. I came back after exploring the town and determining that this just wasn’t the time for me to sail away on my next adventure just yet.